Skyrim: Promotion July 22nd, 2013, 12:21 am
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Before the Steam sale came along and robbed me blind, I was playing a bit of Skyrim. I finally finished a main quest and I must say that I question the system of promotion in Skyrim.
Danaerys Dragnoborn (I am very funny, shush now) is just... not suited for a position of power. At all. Especially not one that involves magic of all things. I think Tolfdir was trying to avoid responsibility here.

Posted @ July 19th, 2013, 12:28 pm

Posted @ July 25th, 2017, 11:32 am

Reader Comments:

Yeah, that always bothered me. Especially when I was also the head of the other guilds in game, and yet nobody really cared or seemed to notice. I never even went back to those places after I completed their quest lines. I am a terrible boss.

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 1:15 am


pretty much me in skyrim

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 1:53 am


Wait, wait, wait a minute! You actually even used the novice flame spell!?

I feel slighly unimpressed that you had to use it to become Arch-Mage.

Also it was extremely easy to do the same thing in Oblivion and one could basically get the same reaction as Danaerys here.(Danaerys, really?)

Maybe for a challenge: Become the Harbinger of the Companions as a full-on mage. :)

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 2:16 am


@zenat: I'm sure every character in Skyrim was trying to avoid responsibility. Examples!

Jarl of Whiterun: Sends the main character along with his men to slay a dragon. Most of them died except the Dragonborn because even if he/she does die, he/she has to start over again.

Brynjolf: Recruits the Dragonborn, sends him/her to do crimes that are most popular (arson, breaking and entering, killing, and stealing), finds out the boss Mercer stole everything and has the Dragonborn go with to get the Guild's stuff back, and nominates him leader.

Tolfdir: No need to explain, this comic apparently already did that.

Viarmo: Sends you to get a book for a tradition from a dead king because it's somehow worth it, only to find out most of the words are gone, but hey, let's put "this and that" in there and people will buy this crap! YAAAAAAAAAY!

The Companions: DB sees a Giant attacking, helps a group of warriors kill it for no gain whatsoever, and they see it as a perfect opportunity for manipulation. What happens next? Kodlak, Aela, Farkas, Vilkas, and Skjor give DB a To-Do List, make him into a werewolf because they want to treat him/her like a lapdog, have DB kill their enemies, and have him/her cure them of lycanthropy because they know they won't have anything better to do once they're dead (Kodlak and Skjor for instance).

Karliah: Like Brynjolf, drags DB to get their stuff back, except she has him/her take a key back to where it belongs, facing corrupt spirits, burning lights, and a glitchy well. Now you know how Little Timmy felt, only instead of having a Collie going to get help, you get stuck with an immortal talking dog named Barbas, who on some occasions will try to kill you when unexpected, such as pushing you off a cliff. Once the key is returned, DB not only loses the key, he/she gets powers that really serve no purpose. In short, DB gets nothing but a note that says "U GAWT R1PP3D 0FF, BIATCH!"

Astrid: DB steals a kill from the Leader of Dark Brotherhood. Objective: Assassinate an old woman in charge of an orphanage. Optional: Kill any witnesses. ANY. DB gets kidnapped and has to kill another person "because it wouldn't be fair if you took someone's target." But then once that person is dead, DB becomes a member of Dark Brotherhood and gets assigned to do some genocide. In a way it goes like this: "Kill this person. Now kill that person. Now kill whatever the hell that thing is." But throughout all the killing, DB realizes this is a slow process of Astrid's way of getting payback for the stolen kill, only to have it back"fire" on her when things go south. Then she leaves DB with a last request to kill her with a knife because for some reason burning her isn't enough. Once DB kills her, it makes him/her wonder, "Was it really getting even, or a plot towards the longest suicide attempt?" WooooOOOOOooooo!!!!

The Grey Beards: Men with grey beards who are admired by many as the most badass citizens of Skyrim, except by the Blades because their boss is a dragon, and that makes them jealous because they don't have a dragon (You know they want one! ^_^). After the Beards noticed DB slayed and consumed a dragon, they tell him/her "HEY! CLIMB THE TALLEST MOUNTAIN!" By the time he/she reaches the top, one of them teaches a shout and says "Congratulations, you learned how to make people deaf. Now climb back down and learn more shouts until you're ready to meet our leader and climb back up again." Why do they force DB to do this? Because when you climb up and down the tallest mountain, you become one with the Beards. And when you become one with the Beards, you're on a whole new level of badass. And when you're on a new level of badass, you don't learn the definition of it, you MAKE the definition of it. Learn the ways of the Grey Beards.

Daedra: Out of all the characters of Elder Scrolls, these demonic creatures are the most common to manipulate the main character, but in sense it's a "good" way. Why? Aside from the Side Quest characters, you get something that's of actual use, whether its a ring to turn you into a werewolf, even if you already are, a long ass sword to kill close friends, an armor that does extra damage if you feel hitting someone isn't enough, or a staff that can turn your enemies into chickens. All of these come with great uses, except there's a catch: You have to GET the item. Henceforth the manipulation, but in a way, the Daedra seem to teach the Dragonborn something: "If you want something really bad, you have to earn it." So aside from all the killing, destruction, and mayhem he/she has to cause, it leaves one with a question, "Are the Daedra really that bad?"

Stormcloaks and Imperials (A.K.A. the Rebels and the Empire): "You're in the army now. You're a soldier. Now put a helmet on, get out there, and make your mama proud! And if you live, go home and be a family man!" Simple as that.

Serana: The only character in the game that rejects the Dragonborn in trading for items such as the Elder Scroll until he/she is begging on his/her knees. DB is the bitch, and Serana is the vamp. And she doesn't even have to bite to make DB the slave. Tells him/her to go in a world full of dead people to find her mom, and he/she does it. Simple as that.

The Blades: They are practically manipulating the Dragonborn into recruiting members to make a FOXHOUND type military in order to make them more badass since they don't have a dragon. Sure, they kill dragons, but is there a reason? Why, yes there is! If they can't have one, NO ONE CAN! Which probably explains why they want the Dragonborn to kill the leader of the Greybeards, Paarthurnax.

And lastly the big guy himself, Paarthurnax: The greatest manipulation he can do of the game is have DB kill him and his brother Alduin. Why is it the greatest? Look at this way, the game states you can do the main quests right away and do the others later, but when you do, you realize the actual message Paarthurnax is giving once you slay him. "Nice job, you ruined your chances of getting stronger, making a storyline for yourself, and having the opportunity of punching my brother to death with your fists. In a way, you just ruined your chances of an epic battle. I'd do something about that, but unfortunately I'm dying... Lolz."

So why do the people of Skyrim avoid responsibility? Because they don't want to do jack sh)@#!

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 2:34 am


i guess c.v are pointless if you can kill a man by pointing at him XD
hilarious comic!

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 10:43 am


I've honestly questioned this as well. I want to say since you're at liberty to tailor the character to your needs and wants throughout the game, that it rectifies it...but it really doesn't in the long-run. It's kinda nice to see you can get multiple high-positions of power in the land without really trying or fitting the part, though.

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 1:25 pm


That's how I felt throughout most of the Elder Scrolls games I've played. Though I did have some magic this roll around...

I could conjure things, and by things I mean two bound swords and only those. Who needs to buy a blade when you can just summon one.

Posted @ July 22nd, 2013, 2:38 pm


Past Games

@zenat: Oblivion was about as bad. I had an Argonian who knew basically nothing about magic and whose main skill was punching people to death become Archmage, and a Breton with no non-magical stealth skills at all become the head of the Thieves' Guild. Morrowind, on the other hand, averts this problem by requiring you to have skills relevant to an organization before being promoted.

Posted @ July 23rd, 2013, 11:14 am


@Griffen: It seems to me that that's a most natural reaction. Which is perhaps why you shouldn't be made head of an organization with no quests that comes afterwards.

@Deonis: Danaerys Dragonborn will take Skyrim with fire and blood! (look, it makes me giggle whenever I realize what I named her, and it keeps me going. I quit on my dunmer after level 20 or so. Stop judging meeeee)

@Sagat the Tiger: Whoa! That's... uh, a lot of spoilers. I'm not going to be reading it, sorry, I hate spoilers D:

@Losuurx: On one hand, yes, but on the other... I think I would have been happier if I had to pick just the one title and go for that. And perhaps fight to keep it too.

@Lali: A most excellent point. I've never used that spell though. Perhaps I should give it a go in the future... at least it ought to be guaranteed not to accidentally murder my companion, unlike the fire spell.

@riverdaleswhiteflash: I've heard rumors of Morrowind being better in this regard. I bought it before the Steam sales started, but haven't gotten around to it though.

Posted @ July 23rd, 2013, 3:37 pm


@zenat: Ah that's fine. Maybe after the game then?

Posted @ July 23rd, 2013, 6:19 pm


@zenat: I honestly like the sound of it... having the occasional usurper tracking summoning you for proof of your worth..but you have to admit being the Guildmaster of the Thieve's Guild and Listener of the Dark Brotherhood go hand-in-hand. Now that I think about this though...they really had a lot go work with for some other little unimportant guilds. Smithing...Alchemy...hell, I could even imagine something to deal with shopkeepers. It makes me wish they would've stayed at Skyrim a little longer for perhaps more DLC-there's so much untapped potential.

Posted @ July 24th, 2013, 3:34 pm


There's a mod for that!

@zenat: I haven't used it, because my current DB is a mage, but there's a mod that will let you decline being Archmage and letting Tolfdir take over.

Posted @ August 14th, 2013, 10:58 pm


Well, Tolfdir is pretty useless.

He's an alteration trainer who only teaches three spells (at least when I was playing before). He also left his alembic under a table and refuses to let me return it.

Posted @ November 9th, 2013, 6:11 am